Wednesday, 27 July 2016

Here's my view ...


Yeah, it's been a while since I posted anything on my blog. 

One does get dry end sometimes. 

I don't know about others, but for me, noticing the attitude of others around me to anything in terms of body language and what they say or don't say or do, is key and speaks volumes.

The saying action speaks louder than words is indeed paramount. I try to be giving, helpful and caring to all around me. My mantra is being there for others.



But lately I've found that people tend to misread one's good intentions whether they are those who know you well and should know better or talk less of those who don't. This part of the world so much mysticism, secrecy bounds our actions and activities for fear of competition, envious acts from others or even evil intents to curb progress.



And so you find that trying to help or be amiable to other is often misread.



Even with family, relatives and close friends, the story is pretty much the same if not worse. Family as in extended and even siblings re secretive and it's almost a taboo to ask about anything that concerns them except they willingly give any information about themselves. It's much the same amongst friends and supposed close friends. Sometimes any attempt to be nice and show concern send people's defensive scanners up. The underlying sense of why does this person want to know, why be so nice, something will come of it is always upmost on the minds of many confronted by the graciousness and warmth of others.



So I ask, is it wrong to be amiable and show interest in those around you? When is being kind and nice too much and why do people read meaning into such acts.



This is where the body language phenomenon comes in. When you reach out to some one and over time you begin to sense a withdrawal mode, topics changed abruptly during conversations, missed calls not returned or text messages ignored over time, signs of impatience or someone feigning being busy when encountered, responses snapped at moments of conversation, signs of distraction, the list is endless. Most of this signs goes on to border on bad behaviour and at the extreme even rude all because someone cared to show Intrest in the things that concern another person.




True, in this part of the world, many have been worse off for being open and accommodating others, some have even been trampled upon in the process and become casualties of bad intents of others. Still, everybody can not and certainly wil not be the same. It's a matter of getting to know the good genuine people around you which I admit may not be easy to ascertain all of the time.




My take is this; If you do not wish to extend a hand of fellowship or friendship to someone, or do not want the attention of others, let them know as tactfully as you can. This is clearly better than behaving badly to other, yes even if it is about your life, anytin that revolves around you or not. Those who show Interest in us do care and it's not because they have nothing better to do and should be accorded that much regard.



There will be the occasional busybody or someone clearly not good for you in anyway, still we should take a clear stand in anything we choose to do or want such that those around us would clearly know and respect our wish.
We all should regard each other and at best be well behaved at all times. Remember, nobody likes to be on the wrong end of the stick and maltreated in anyway and most certainly not when all they have really, is good intentions.




This is my view.

Saturday, 9 April 2016

SOCIETAL EXPECTATIONS???



Sometime ago, i attended a function. It was a landmark birthday celeberation of an uncle and the family decided to mark the day in a ceremonial yet subtle manner.

He wanted to celebrate his day with a thankful heart in the midst of family close friends and colleagues. It indeed was a lovely fun filled party of less than hundred guests.

Friday, 19 February 2016

Boundaries in Giving!


Ok, so I've been on a long break for a while now. Too many distractions with  the baggage of daily living. Now it's the month of love and giving - valentine love so to speak!

Friday, 18 September 2015

Timely Action!


Do you ever get that feeling to shout with all your might or scream over issues you find very frustrating?

I do, and often too.

One of the things that tick me off is procradtination and people being laid back on things. Procrastination and not making a move to make things you know you need to take a decision on or make a move on and timely too can be nerve wracking to those who can only move forward on whatever step you take.

Simply put, do not keep people or others waiting at such moments.

Today's topic is TIMELY ACTION!

Wednesday, 16 September 2015

Selflessness!


This morning I'm feeling a bit blue and a friend sent me an encouraging text, showing a lot of love and concern. She said she understood how I felt as she finds herself in that situation often. She sent hugs and kisses. I was deeply encouraged as she is a friend that takes time out to check up on me and encourage me often.

This led me to think of those moments when I'm down in one way or the other whether physically, emotionally or financially, and those around me like family and friends know and I expect some show of concern or encouragement and I get a dead end.

Sometimes I do get a bit of attention, yes, most times from unexpected quarters whilst those I expect to hear from do not show intrest either out of being too busy to remember or are consumed by their own issues. This brings me to today's topic; SELFLESSNESS . 

Friday, 11 September 2015

When are cultural norms going too far?



It's that time of the year again when wedding bells start ringing all over the place and invitations come pouring in on wedding itienaries of friends, famiy members, colleagues at work etc.

What follows is tedious wedding plans/arrangements, booking of wedding vendors, a lot of euphoric and feverish organising of one thing or the other topped with stressful excitement overloads for all concerned!

Friday, 4 September 2015

Have you been served lately?



I don't know if anyone has noticed but I have experienced deteriorating state of behavior by those who provide services to the public!